by Lindsay Britton
With so much talk of the favorites, top seeds, and possible Cinderella’s in this year’s NCAA tournament, why not take a look at some of the real winners and losers of the next few weeks?
Winner: You.
Loser: Your boss /The American Workplace.
Face it, you’ll phone in sick on Thursday and Friday so that you can watch 16th seeded teams los
e by 50. In fact, you’re probably on WebMD right now looking for an obscure medical condition to claim. Although the typical cold and flu excuses will probably work, in situations like these I always play it safe and fake my own kidnapping. But, the police tend to follow up on “incidents” like that, so be sure to prepare a good back story. Just something to be aware of. CBS is even broadcasting some games live online, ensuring that workplace production will hit an all-time low. Hey, what recession?Winner: Face/body paint companies.
Loser: People who wear face/body paint.
Unless your name is Bobo the Clown, you have no business wearing face paint to a sporting event. Ditto for team logo stickers/decals/whatever on your face. Cheerleaders (female) are exempt, but no one else, especiall
y not the 400-pound Michigan fan who thinks maize and blue body paint is an acceptable substitute for a shirt. It isn’t. Nothing makes me happier than when face-painted idiots break down and start crying because their team lost. But hey, I guess if self-respect is out of your price range you can always buy some more face paint.Winner: The city of Detroit, for hosting the Final Four
There’s no real loser here, but how often do Detroit and “Winner” appear on the same line?
BONUS!!! Bold tournament prediction: Your team will lose. Yes, yours. Take off the face paint
http://blog.ingamenow.com/2009/03/18/predicting-the-winners-and-losers-of-the-ncaa-tournament/.
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